Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
