Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
