Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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