He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
