I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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