There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.