I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
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He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
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At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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