The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Drunk is not a location!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
