He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
