After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
