I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
