Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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