I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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