she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She's the barista slut.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
