i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I want a musical about memes.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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