My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
