Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
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