The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
