So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
