I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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