Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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