batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
