I wanna bring you to show and tell
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
