That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
