dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
