So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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