I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
