I didn't shave. On purpose
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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