god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
there was a trapeze. enough said
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize