I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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