Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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