Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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