I think I died a long time ago.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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