You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
