I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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