I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
