just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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