hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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