Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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