marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Randomize
