Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
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