I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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