How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
