it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
we're making bets on your personal life
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
