My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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