I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
