So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Operation Purity has been aborted
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Randomize
