Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize