You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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