return my video game
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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