no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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