He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
