She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
