You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
We don't watch enough power rangers
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize
